Well, we’re getting closer to the big road trip! The birthday has come and gone, the job has come and gone. I spent a good portion of this week running errands mostly related to car care. So my little VW!NotABug has new tires, fresh oil, clean filters, fluids galore, new wipers, is vacuumed, Windexed, and Armor All'd. Just look at her now…she’s eager to hit the road!
So am I, frankly. With my final paycheck, I splurged on a bunch of new photography equipment, including a 50mm f1.4 prime lens that makes me weep every time I shoot a photo with it. I’ve spent my extra time during the first week of my unemployment learning the lens and shooting a ton of crap photos learning this or that technique. I think I’ve reached a point where I’m making progress, then I realize I don’t really understand half of what I think I know. I’ve tried so many different things, my head is spinning. I’m looking forward to the structure of school and the ways it will push me into areas I probably wouldn’t explore if not forced.
My little jewel of a neighbor, Marybeth, continues to be my best little model. Although she has no patience for posing, so she’s not only helping me learn portrait techniques, she’s also helping me learn to shoot FAST! So nice to have that fast prime lens with her as my subject.
I hit a slump a little while back where all my photos were just crap. For some reason, focus was just not on the agenda. I almost got discouraged, but then I got mad instead. So I cracked down and spent a couple of days figuring out what the hell I was doing wrong. Turned out to be a combination of things; depth of field issues, camera shake issues, AND Autofocus settings gone awry. So I went for a rainy-day walk (it always rains here now apparently) and spent hours shooting photos on full Auto mode so I could focus on…well, focus! Working hand held and focusing all my neurons on holding the damn camera still. These are skills I had at one point, I just started taking them for granted, I guess. Shooting too fast, not concentrating…snap and go, then get home to BLUR! Feh. Spending a day slowing down, framing and taking shots slower and more deliberately was all I needed to remind myself. Practice, practice, practice until it’s second nature…that’s my modus operandi.
A site where they’re tearing a building down made for some interesting shots on my FOCUS DAMN IT walk.
And the significant improvement in my photos made my attitude better. Got the creative juices flowing. I’ve started keeping a notebook of photo ideas and I jotted one down my last week of work. I was thinking about Star Trek (no idea why) and started pondering what a spaceship’s controls would look like. Thinking about that gave me the idea to shoot light coming up through this cool paperweight I’ve got.
Long boring story short…this is the first photo I’ve ever taken where I conceptualized the image before I shot it…and it came out EXACTLY like I imagined it! I know that sounds like a ‘so what’ but it’s a freaking milestone! I know the camera well enough to get it to do what I want and not just set it, point it, and see what happens. I KNOW what’s going to happen! Well, most of the time. More practice!!
Here’s the shot…pure camera…not Photoshop. :D
I’m so excited about everything, and yet the little voices of doubt in my head won’t shut up.
“You can’t go to all these concerts! You have no JOB!”
Yeah, but I’ll work on that in a few weeks.
“You can’t be a photographer!!!”
Why not? Weirder things have happened.
“You know multiple photographers far better than you who gave it up and chose another career!”
Yeah, so I chose IT and I’m giving that up for another career. Maybe I’ll never make a living at it…maybe I will. *shrug* At least I won’t have to wonder if I could have done it or not.
So shut up little paranoid voice that sounds horribly, frighteningly like my panic-prone mother…at this point I’m ready to rip my life open and rearrange the fuck out of it. So I’m ripping it open with a completely new career direction, a long road trip, and screaming loud rock music! I can’t freaking wait!! One more week until the Foogasm tour begins!
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